Photo
deductivereasonable:

h34rken:

put a fucking bag on your head and sleep you god damn piece of shit

take a nap on a fucking ski lift

deductivereasonable:

h34rken:

put a fucking bag on your head and sleep you god damn piece of shit

take a nap on a fucking ski lift

(via burningvaginas)

Text

motherfuckingshakespeare:

akafoxxcub:

the best is when you’re reminded that “nothing” is elizabethan slang for female genitals, so shakespeare literally titled his play

much ado about pussy

Ah, Shakespeare. Such fine and serious art. So serious.

(via your-forestlass)

Text

lesbianvenom:

when steve rogers sleeps for 70 years he’s hailed “a hero” and “an icon” but when i take a five hour nap my mom says i’m “lazy” and “need to find better ways to spend my time” such bullshit

(via herromeo)

Photo
hetalia-rainbow:

ultrafacts:

For more posts like this, follow Ultrafacts (Source)

"Sorry bro""S’all good bro"

hetalia-rainbow:

ultrafacts:

For more posts like this, follow Ultrafacts (Source)

"Sorry bro"
"S’all good bro"

(Source: ultrafacts, via ultrafacts)

Text

luigiman:

my cousin asked me what my favorite season was and i said “of what” and i just

(via boogiedowndeath)

Photoset
Tags: hilarious
Photo
misha-dmitri-t-krushnic-collins:

pivotalwolf:

anorie:

lotrlockedwhovian:

baara:

the lady behind the counter asked how much whipped cream I wanted and I asked for a shit ton and then she came back with this

We now know the exact amount of shit ton, thank you for your contribution

#Excellent customer service

I used to work at Dunkin and I swear you would do things like this on peoples ridiculous requests and it either got a chuckle and a thank you… Or they bitched you out for being a smart ass.
Example: one time a dude asked for heavy cream so my cashier asked how white they wanted the coffee and they said make it purple. So I went to the decoration area and got flavorless food dye and made it purple. Never had a dude laugh harder in my life

this woukd have made me so happy

misha-dmitri-t-krushnic-collins:

pivotalwolf:

anorie:

lotrlockedwhovian:

baara:

the lady behind the counter asked how much whipped cream I wanted and I asked for a shit ton and then she came back with this

We now know the exact amount of shit ton, thank you for your contribution

I used to work at Dunkin and I swear you would do things like this on peoples ridiculous requests and it either got a chuckle and a thank you… Or they bitched you out for being a smart ass.

Example: one time a dude asked for heavy cream so my cashier asked how white they wanted the coffee and they said make it purple. So I went to the decoration area and got flavorless food dye and made it purple. Never had a dude laugh harder in my life

this woukd have made me so happy

(via boogiedowndeath)

Photo
xoxo-gossip-gay:

xoxo-gossip-gay:

My offer just sent me an adorable revision guide and I think it included a condom

it was a tea bag

xoxo-gossip-gay:

xoxo-gossip-gay:

My offer just sent me an adorable revision guide and I think it included a condom

it was a tea bag

(via estcequetuaimeslesexe)

Text

bae-leaves:

when u accidentally drop ur phone on ur face.

image

(via herromeo)

Tags: lmao
Text

weedjoke420:

she’s beauty and she’s grace, she dropped her phone on her face

(via herromeo)